Category Archives: Things I Want

Ipod Touch == Shiny Happy Monkey

I bought a 4th gen Ipod touch this week. I know I said I really wanted an Iphone 4, but I figured an Ipod touch is more practical and budget friendly (translation: an Iphone 4 is fucking expensive). Compared to the 3rd gen Ipod touch, there’s not much difference (aside from the new cameras). But since my old Ipod was a 1st generation one, the upgrade in features justifies getting the new Ipod touch. I couldn’t find any protective casings for sale yet, so I’m uber careful handling the thing. I think I would literally lose my fucking mind if I scratch the damn thing. So please hurry up with the protective casings already!!

Still, I’m enjoying it. I love my new Ipod. I’m pretty happy. I guess until Apple releases their next ipod. Then Steve jobs is going to go around and say that its the most revolutionary Ipod they have ever made, its the coolest, anyone who owns a lower version is a fucking loser, yada yada yada.

Advertisements

4 Comments

Filed under Things I Want

Fuck Moore’s Law!

Moore’s law describes a long-term trend in the history of computing hardware. The number of transistors that can be placed inexpensively on an integrated circuit has doubled approximately every two years. The trend has continued for more than half a century and is not expected to stop until 2015 or later.

The capabilities of many digital electronic devices are strongly linked to Moore’s law: processing speed, memory capacity, sensors and even the number and size of pixels in digital cameras. (from Wikipedia of course)

Being from the IT industry, I’m thankful for this law. It’s what keeps firmware/software developers relevant. If not  for Moore’s Law, a lot of us code monkeys would be out of work.

But still… Fuck Moore’s Law.

It’s a double-edged sword. I happen to be a guy who just loves gadgets. I love having the latest shiny new toy. Gaming consoles, handhelds, cellphones, and MP3 player’s specifically. When a new iteration of one of these bad boys comes out, I get an uncontrollable  urge to own one. Now let us begin the story of how Moore’s Law fucked with my life.

Chapter 1: Moore’s Law Fucks My Walkman Phone

Around four years ago, I graduated from college and started working. I decided to splurge on a new cellphone. So I bought one of these:

It was cool, sleek and sexy. I was gaga over my new walkman phone. I showed it off to my friends and co workers and we all agreed it was a bad ass toy.  Then after a few months, a co-worker of mine gets one of these:

It’s everything my phone was but cooler, sleeker and (sigh) sexier. In short my phone was now grade A garbage.

Chapter 2: Moore’s Law Fucks My PSP

After resisting for almost a year and a half, I finally decided to get a PSP.

I played the shit out of my PSP. Everyone at the office started wanting one. I urged them to get PSPs so we could play multiplayer games.They did. but they got this:

After one fucking month the 2nd generation PSP comes out. The PSP slim comes out after a fucking month! The first generation then gets called the PSP fat. And it really is a damn fatass.

Chapter 3: Moore’s Law Fucks My Ipod Touch

When I first saw the Ipod Touch, I knew I wanted one, but when It was released, they only had 8Gig and 16 Gig models.  I figured the capacities available were inadequate, so I waited. When a 32Gig model came out I bought one.

The Ipod touch was the epitome of cool. I was in gadget heaven playing around with it. Again, I was the envy of my peers. Everyone wanted one. Then, like always Moore’s Law rears it’s fucking head. This comes out:

Compared to the walkman phone and the PSP issue, this one really got me pissed. The Ipod is not just an Mp3 player, it’s an accessory. And my 1st generation Ipod touch was suddenly uncool, sqaure and sooooo 2008. To make matters worse, stores suddenly phased out all first generation Ipod touch accessories. Of course, as if to pour salt on an open wound, all my office mates got a 2nd generation Touch.

Conclusion: Moore’s Law Fucks the Future

First my walkman phone hurt me, then my fatass PSP shamed me, then my Ipod Touch made me a fashion don’t!  There’s only so much I can take!!!

Now you have an idea of what Moore’s Law does to someone like me. And its starting again. In a few months, this comes out:

I am literally salivating over this thing. I really want one even though I know if I buy one, after 6 months (or a year if I’m lucky), a second genertion Iphone 4 is going to come out. The thing is going to be so much cooler and cost so much more. Then I’m going to be miserable all over again. Moore’s Law has put me in a vicious cycle of desire, happiness and utter misery. So I say Fuck you Moore’s Law!  You may put food on my table but you also bring me nothing but pain and suffering.

Fuck you, you unmerciful bastard.

14 Comments

Filed under Loathing, Ramblings, Things I Want

Movie Wish List

Ever read a book/comic, play a game or watch an animated show and go “Damn, if they made a live action movie based on this it would be the shit!”? Yeah? Me too. Here’s my list of live action movies I want made.

Based on Comics/Graphic Novels

Sandman


I’ve been fantasizing about this for years! Dream and the rest of the Endless on the big screen! I even made a list of the cast I want in my old blog (here if anyone’s interested).

Wildcats


Superhero movies are really big nowadays… So why hasn’t image gotten in on the action? Maybe because Spawn literally sucked ass. It was terrible. But it wasn’t The Last Airbender terrible. I think someone in Hollywood should give Image titles another go. I think it should be Wild Cats. A Wild Cats movie would be cool. As long as they cast the right Grifter and Zealot.

Based on books

Dune


The thinking man’s Star Wars! This was made into a movie a long time ago (which bombed I’m told), so I’m actually wishing for a reboot. Dune deserves a reboot more than Spiderman!

A Song of Ice and Fire


The books aren’t even finished and I’m already wishing for movies about them. This should tell you how awesome I think these books are. A song of Ice and Fire is the best fantasy series to come out since the Lord of the Rings. I think it’s even better. George Martin is a fucking deity. A very stubborn lazy procrastinating deity. Finish the damn books George!

By the way, Hbo is making a series about a song of ice and fire. If I can’t get the movies, a series by HBO is the next best thing.

Ender’s Game


Making a movie about Ender’s game would be difficult primarily because most of the important characters are children. But please Hollywood , please try. I’m begging you! I love Ender Wiggin! Of course in a non pedophilic kind of way.

Based on Games

Mass Effect


Think Mission Impossible meets Star Trek. Out of everything on this list, Mass effect would make the easiest transition to the big screen. It’s practically begging to be made into a movie…  And it is! At least it’s in development from what I’ve read on the net.

Metal Gear Solid


Snnnaaaaaaakkkkeeee! Out of the whole series, Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater should be the one made into a movie first. Its Story is not only the most awesome of the 4 metal gear solid games, its self contained. Not to mention it’s chronologically the first anyways.

God of war


Make this movie. Put Clash of the Titans in its fucking place.

Based on Animation

Akira


Apparently Leonardo di Caprio’s production company picked this up. I heard this a few months a go. Since there’s no new news, it’s safe to say that Akira the movie is in development limbo. That’s sad; ’cause I’m dying to see a live action Kaneda screaming “TETSUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH” and live action Tetsuo screaming back “KAAAAANEDAAAAAAAAAHHHH” over and over.

Ghost in the shell


Christopher Nolan should make this movie. Please make this your next movie Nolan!

On second thought. Make Batman 3 THEN make Ghost in the Shell.

Well, there’s my list. If a movie were ever based on any item above. I would buy the tickets, the popcorn, and sodas in advance (I’d just buy more popcorn and soda on the day itself)! I would watch the fuck out of these if they ever became movies. Except maybe if M. Night Shyamalan was the director. Or Uwe Bowle.

If they were in anyway attached to one of these projects, God help us all.

16 Comments

Filed under Things I Want